


Leo has Unwanted Middle Child Syndrome

by nyanbacon



Category: Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (Cartoon 2018)
Genre: Angst, Brotherly Love, Hurt/Comfort, inescurities, self doubt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-25
Updated: 2018-09-25
Packaged: 2019-07-17 13:10:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,033
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16096337
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nyanbacon/pseuds/nyanbacon
Summary: After slipping up and saying something he didn’t mean to, Leo is confronted by Raph about insecurities he’s been hiding for years.---First place winner of the Most In Character Leonardo category of the 2018 TMNT Universal Reader's Choice Awards





	Leo has Unwanted Middle Child Syndrome

**Author's Note:**

> This takes place after RotTMNT episode Down With The Sickness. Just my personal interpretation of Leo's character. Raph and Leo both might be a bit OOC because the change in character from 2012 has totally messed me up.

Leo sighed as he carefully put a bandaid over the bite on his shoulder. It was still sore, and he wasn’t sure he’d be able to have full function for a while until it was fully healed, but he could fight just fine with it- judging by the fact Raph had gotten angry at him for cutting his way out of quarantine- so he wasn’t too worried about it.

He dropped down to sit on the edge of his bed and carefully rested his face in his hands. Raph had gotten annoyed at him for screwing up the Say Yes stage at the last second, and Leo felt bad,  _ really _ bad, but Raph hadn’t given him a chance to explain himself before storming off, ultimately leaving Leo to deal with what had happened on his own.

So now he sat, thinking over what he could remember. The worst thing about the flu is that it messed so badly with their heads that they didn’t usually remember what happened to them, or what they did during it, so it was hard to recall everything. Leo could just remember what had happened right before, and when he was coming down from the high, and all that was in between were some glimpses of what had been going on- nothing defined, something closer to flashes of color and some abstract feelings he wasn’t able to pin down. 

He lifted his head suddenly when he heard the door to his room open, and he sat up with a frown. Raph slipped into the room, bearing a similar frown when he saw Leo watching the doorway. “Hey.”

“Hey. You looking for something?” Leo asked, not hostile but not inviting either. He hadn’t been expecting Raph to come back so quickly after snapping at him.

“I’m looking for you.”

Leo blinked before snorting, rolling his eyes. “Of course you are.” He put his hands behind his head and leaned back. “Who wouldn’t be?”

“Can’t you be serious for a second, Leo?” An edge crept back into Raph’s voice, and Leo lowered his hands so he could lean on them. 

“What’s there to be serious about? We’re not a very serious group of kids.”

Raph sighed, looking up at the ceiling in a fed up manner. “You’re impossible.”

Leo grinned, but it slipped off his face when Raph’s serious gaze settled back on him. He shifted a bit uncomfortably and crossed his legs. “Why were you looking for me?” He finally asked, drawing the conversation back to the original topic. Maybe if they got it over with, Raph would leave sooner. 

“I wanted to ask you about something you said earlier.”

Leo raised a brow. “Didn’t know you paid attention to what I had to say.”

Raph frowned at him, deeply, and Leo quickly caught on that that had been the wrong thing to say at that moment. “I always listen to what you have to say.”

“Oh,” Leo said dumbly. That wasn’t what he’d wanted to hear. 

“So, earlier, when Splinter had managed to  _ get inside your hazmat suit _ -”

Leo visibly cringed.

“- why’d you say you were his least favorite.”

Oh.  _ Oh _ . If Leo were honest with himself, he’d forgotten that had happened.

“Well, ya see Raph.” Leo pushed himself to his feet with a flourish. “Sometimes we say things we think will get us out of a bad situation, even if we don’t necessarily mean it.”

“But I know you meant it.”

Leo let out a short laugh. “No you don’t.”

“You just told me you didn’t think I listened to what you had to say,” Raph stated, narrowing his eyes, and Leo felt his stomach sink a bit. “On top of the fact you think your Splinter’s least favorite.”

Leo folded his arms over his chest and looked away, avoiding meeting Raph’s piercing gaze. It felt like he was boring holes into Leo’s shell. “There’s a difference between thinking and knowing,” he muttered.

“Leo, you can’t  _ mean _ that.” Raph picked his way across the room so he could place a hand on Leo’s shell. “Splinter doesn’t pick favorites.”

“Yes he does, Raph, and you know it.” Leo was quick to shrug Raph’s hand off and take one step away. “Have you looked at all the things he does for you guys?”

“It’s because you act out, Leo. No one wants to reward-”

“I act out because I have to have  _ something _ !” Leo took another step back, but was getting dangeorulsly close to the wall.  “Even when I didn’t, I was just overlooked. I felt…  _ god,  _ Raph, I felt  _ unwanted _ .”

Raph hesitated, staring at him, and Leo quickly ducked down, slipping past Raph towards the door. He didn’t want to stay, he didn’t want to see the expresiosn Raph looked at him with, he didn’t want to see the same look Leo looked at himself with in Raph’s eyes, because it would make it  _ true _ and he wouldn’t be able to escape-

Raph suddenly caught Leo’s arm and the smaller turtle nearly fell back with the force. Leo quickly squeezed his eyes shut, holding his breath. There was something tight in his chest that he knew would make his breath shake if he even tried to ease it. 

“Leo, look at me.”

Leo looked up at Raph and he could feel the tears in his eyes. Raph quickly pulled Leo to his chest in a hug- it wasn’t bear crushing, but it was tight, and it squeezed a sob out of Leo.

“You’re not unwanted,” Raph murmured, and Leo quickly hid his face from the larger turtle.

“Even when I’m causing problems?” He asked, voice shaking a bit. 

“Even when you’re causing problems,” Raph promised, rubbing Leo’s shell carefully.

Leo sniffed and didn’t lift his face. “Okay…”

After a moment of composing himself, Leo pulled away and wiped his face on his forearm. “That was dumb.”

“Leo-” Raph started, but he quickly cut him off. 

“You promise you won’t tell Don ‘nd Mike about this?”

Raph looked at him before nodding. “Yeah, sure.”

Leo nodded and rubbed his arm, pointedly not looking at him. “And… thanks.”

This made Raph grin- Leo could hear it in his voice. “Anytime.”


End file.
